I had been trying to get a printer delivered for days. Fedex left a note on my door showing that they had made a delivery attempt and that if I wanted the article left on my porch to just sign the said note. I did so and the next day no printer; just another note. Ok perhaps they did not see my signed ticket. Friday no note or ticket was left on the doorstep. No printer either. I checked their website and saw that a third delivery had been attempted. No so fast. I think that the Fedex person did not even stop by. Probably just entered the "third attempt/no delivery info" into their little hand held thingy and kept on trucking. Perhaps the driver was late for some afternoon delight or something. Who knows? I do know that no attempt was made. I was kinda annoyed to say the least. Ok so Saturday morning gave Fedex a call. There is a facility about 20 minutes away and I figured I would go pick it up. Well turns out that the printer was being held hostage at a facility approximately an hour drive away in Webster, TX, according to the Fedex website. I knew from the block number that this was not in Webster but in Houston almost in the little town of South Houston. Hell and gone from Webster. I figured the facility to be right across the street from Ellington Field which was hosting an airshow this weekend. I envisioned a traffic nightmare. This was about 11am and I could see watching college football playing second fiddle to going to pick up a printer that should have been delivered. Real annoyed now. In the car and off I went. Stopped by a Starbucks for a mocha to clear my head and continued my journey all the while fantasizing about what I was going to say to the poor clerk at the "depot." Finally made it about 1pm or so and the airshow was getting into full swing. Traffic sucked but not as bad a I thought it might. Went in to the little office and was greeted by a very very beautiful young African American woman who took my information and got the ball rolling. A couple of minutes later she came back and told me that it would be a bit; my printer was on a trailer. I wondered where the trailer may have been headed but I had to whizz so bad that I just asked if I could borrow the facilities instead. Besides by now I was enamored with this pretty lady especially when she bent over and I saw this cutesy tattoo on her lower back. Her bottom was a pretty site also I must say. Downright pretty. The song Black Metallic by Catherine Wheel began to play in my head. Have I gone too far here? Anyway by now another man had come into the little lobby with his wife in tow. As a student of human nature I kept an eye on the guy to see if he would notice how beautiful the Fedex lady was. Of course he tried not to glance but glance he did. I caught him red handed. His wife did not seem to notice. They were an older couple and probably she did not much care anyway. "Let the old fart steal his little glances" was probably her attitude about it. Or so I would guess. It was a pretty interesting little scenario. Well after about fifteen minutes someone arrived with my printer. I was rather content now and no longer in the mood to bitch about the poor service so much. Funny how you feel much better after a good whiz. I certainly was not going to give that lovely lady a hard time. Especially after she let me in to pee in the employee restroom. Nope I just chalked it up to another one of life's little irritations and went on my way. I also got to watch a bit of the airshow from the parking lot of the facility without paying admission to the air field. That was cool. I must say that those powers that be in Iran still do not seem to know who they are jacking with. Some of the military equipment flying around there was downright amazing. Beautiful lethality is the phrase that crossed my mind.
Well I did miss some college ball I wanted to watch and did have to take a rather long drive but all in all the day was not a total wash out. I am still calling Fedex out for poor service however. They should correct the address on their website to at least read the right city and they should probably audit their drivers performance a bit more. I know damn good and well the lazy prick (or prickess) did not attempt to make a third delivery. I also must add that I never have had this type of issue with UPS. If I have a choice in the matter, I will not use Fedex again.