All three of four of you who may actually read my blog know that I bartend a little, drive a cab some, and work with a local caterer on occasion. I also recently started substitute teaching, which is somewhat interesting. Put it all together and it is a very modest living. Well, not even that really. Thankfully my wife has a pretty good job which keeps this family at least functioning economically, as long as we don't go overboard.
Last night I took a job from a hospitality staffing service to bartend at a "high end" hotel in downtown Houston. It was supposed to be a bartending gig, but when I got there I was assigned to basically just hang around and keep my area picked up. Ok, no problem. This place does tip share and I really did not feel like bartending for a fairly large crowd when I can make the same just standing around. Kind of lazy I know. I probably should have worked the bar as the people they assigned were slow as Christmas. Believe it or not I heard on guy ask another about the proper way to make a vodka tonic. This was done via radio; one of the supervisors was in my vicinity with his radio. Oh well, no skin off my nose. I watched another guy at a satellite bar have difficulty with the cork on a wine bottle. This was a supposedly a"high end" event and it was not "Sutter Home" that he was trying to open. I thought about going over and giving him a little instruction, but I have met the guy and found him a tad arrogant in our earlier conversation. I let him figure it out himself. That being said, I will now get to the main point of this little blog entry.
I have worked at this particular hotel a time or two and the management is some kind of tight assed. The regular employees are perennially frightened for some reason. These guys in suits nitpick about the smallest thing, and are constantly on patrol. There seems to be a whole lot of well dressed chiefs here and not quite enough Indians as they say. I did my best to look busy, and was for the most part pretty busy keeping my area in order, but once or twice I did feel a critical evil eye cast my way and one comment was made to me before the event began that my mustache was a little "bushy." I actually had to go and trim it slightly. Ok, no problem, although if there were any further critical comments I do believe that the guy would have been told to go find a wee wee to smooch. That would have been no problem for him I am sure, but I will get to that in a moment. Another guy had a goatee and was informed that he needed to shave it off which he declined to do. Apparently they let it slide as he worked the entire night. All in all it just turned out be all right. Worked until pretty late in the night, cleaned up, and went home. Other than the anal management though, what was really interesting was the actual event itself. Let me tell you about it.
Although this particular hotel is very upscale, probably number one or two in the Houston area, it does not often host fairly large events. It is not a Hilton, Hyatt or a Crowne Plaza type place that caters to convention type business. It is more of a "boutique" type of place. That may have been one reason why the managers were so anal. They are very uptight on a normal day I have noticed, but last night they were over the top. Anyway, the event itself was some sort of fashion event with predominately Italian clothing and accessories being featured. There were quite a few people from the "Old Country" in attendance and Italian could be heard spoken by many. The food was authentic, and I did get to eat a little after the event. Somewhat different than what you would get at the Olive Garden. Perhaps that is why I have the runs this morning.
What was really wild was the people that attended this event. I have never been around such an interesting or decadent crowd, except perhaps at a "swinger" event.
A good majority of the men were gay, that goes without saying perhaps. After all it was a fashion thing. These guys were what are commonly called "flamers." With a capital F! That is all ok but there was a good deal of hand holding, kissing, and public groping. I mean real ding dong grabbing. Get a room! There were some regular hotel guests in and around the pool while this was taking place. There were a couple of security guys hanging around and they watched but I did not notice them trying to control the situation. I would imagine that they would have been fired if they interfered. The money spent on this event was quite evident. As far as I know, no one unleashed their weapon. Wonder if security would have done anything then?I do not believe I mentioned that the event was held on the "courtyard" which has a pool, enclosed work out space, pool bar and grill, etc. etc. as part of the area. While no one looked offended that I could see, I did see a lot of bemused expressions. I myself was not shocked but did find it somewhat amusing.
There were a lot of guys there that were not openly gay and some of these cats were dressed like something out of the 1978. We are talking about shirts open to the navel and flashy gold chains. The whole nine yards. No one that I saw had "feathered" hair though. Some of these guys had very pretty Oriental women on their arms that were at least half their age. I could not be sure but I would bet the girls were earning a little extra cash themselves that evening. Most likely they were recruited from the numerous "rub and tug" places that are everywhere in Houston. Incidentally, the existence of those type of joints can put substantial money in a cab driver's pocket when there are conventions in town. A lot of "out of town sports" are interested in some extracurricular fun and any cabbie worth his salt knows where this fun is to be had. The bump back that is given to cabbies from these fine business establishments can be fairly substantial; but I digress.
The women at this event, discounting the pretty young Asians, were for the most part, dressed like something out of some off the wall fashion magazine that no one really reads. At least no one I know. They ranged in age from the mid 20's perhaps up to a least 70. The older they were the more outlandish and cartoonish they looked. It was nuts. I did have one of the younger women ask me if I knew the name of the designer of some handbag that was being modeled. Of course I had no earthly idea, but I amused myself by telling her that I believed the designer to be B. Dick Black. I then scooted off into the crowd. She probably didn't buy it but I had my little fun. Here is where it gets really wild. One guy I was working with came up to me and asked if had a seen any p...y. You know what I am talking about? I asked him if he meant literally and he laughed and said "of course." Well I had seen at least 5 full beaver shots plus quite a few "hints of beaver." That sounds like a cologne. Maybe I should market that. Some of the "ladies" at this event evidently do not believe in wearing underwear. Even the teensy thong kind. Apparently they were also not taught by their mother's how to sit in a ladylike fashion. They probably just don't care. Maybe it does not even cross their minds. It was a rather interesting job.
It is sort of funny. One goes about their life wearing "normal" clothes just going with the flow and living life. Then one comes across others so different in attitudes, dress, etc. etc. that it can be rather startling at times. It makes things interesting. We are a strange species.
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